Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Why Are Boys Idiots?

I'll be the first to admit that as a general rule I like boys.  And I don't just mean that I'm a straight female.  I mean that typically I like to hang out with boys more than girls.  It's a trait I inherited from my mother. Luckily I have made friends with girls that also typically like to hang out with boys better than girls, which means I get to have some girlfriends that like to hang out with boys that aren't just their boyfriends. As I have gotten older I tend to have more girlfriends than guy friends. Which suits me just fine, because as I have gotten older I have started to realize that boys are idiots.

There is something about testosterone in general that makes boys dumb.  A pretty girl comes around and they lose their minds.  Suddenly all the normal rational things that usually happen, stop happening.

Take my first ex-husband for example.  I love him.  I think he's great. He's a great dad and if I had to choose someone to not be married to anymore it would be him.  In a good way.  Because really when you have a child with someone, you are stuck with them forever, whether you like them or not.  So it's better when you can like them.

Anyway, I digress.  My first ex-husband has a new girlfriend.  She is young, and super cute and nice.  This only adds to the fact that she turns him into an idiot.  Okay, wait let me rephrase that, HE turns into an idiot. She doesn't do anything except stand there and he forgets that he needs to communicate with me, he looses his train of thought and then when I call him out on being an idiot he gets defensive.

Just because you have a new girlfriend does not mean that you get to stop communicating, or assume that I have a super easy life so I should pick up your slack.  You don't "forget" to tell me something that impacts my entire schedule and week because you went out and forgot.  I'm pretty sure that excuse stopped working at 23.  Which was 11 years ago.  Put on your big boy boxers and deal with your life.  If your girlfriend is worth all of the testosterone and time and effort she'll understand.

The thing is, that as a female, this power is nice.  As an adult that has to interact with men, this tendency for them to turn into idiots, is annoying.  I won't say I have never used the fact that I am a woman to turn a man into a blithering idiot, use the skills you were given I think.  My problem is that the fact that I am having to deal with an idiot through not fault of my own (except that I married and had a child with him) can become very frustrating.

Thank goodness there is beer and football to help guys get their brains back.

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