Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Higher Learning. To Continue or Not?

I've been struggling with the decision to go back to school for winter quarter.  I took fall quarter off because summer quarter completely overwhelmed me and I needed a break.  Between getting a divorce and just being stressed in general I couldn't to it. The idea of going back for winter is stressing me out too.  But my bucket list has "to get a degree" as the number one item.  So what do I do?

On one hand it seems silly not to go back.  It's school.  I enjoy it for the most part. I should have a degree. There really is no good reason not to except for the stress and the time and the juggling that it requires.  

The thing is school will always be there.  I can always go to school.  Like maybe when I'm not as stressed and feeling a little more mentally capable of dealing with it.  But is that ever going to happen? The reality is that I have a 10 year old that requires a lot of time for his extra curricular activities and his school work. Plus just the other general life stuff. 

The other issue is that I am in a position at work where I could potentially move upward and onward. However, one of the reasons that I took this position at this property was that it is fairly easy and definitely conducive to full time schooling. Any other position that I get would NOT be.  It would be more work, and more stress, and more time than I'm even spending now. 

I could take my happy sweet time making a decision except I have two weeks from today to get all my ducks in a row so that I can register.  That includes reinstating my financial aid, since I took this quarter off, going to see a school counselor AND figuring out what classes to take.  Oh, and if I don't go back this quarter I'll have to start paying my loans back.  Shit. 

Usually when I pound out all my thoughts and feelings on this keyboard by the time I'm finished with my post I have worked through whatever issue I'm writing about.  That isn't happening this time. This decision is eluding me.  I guess I need to make a pros and cons list :-)

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