Wednesday, November 12, 2014

F&$k Hormones and Emotions and Stuff

I woke up this morning in a horrible mood.  Generally angry at the world and a hormonal ball of emotions.  I threw glasses around the kitchen, slammed drawers and cabinets then got in the car to drive to work a mess of tears and yelling frustration.

I have absolutely no reason at all to be angry, or sad or really any negative emotion.  That is one of the sucky things about being a girl.  There are times that you just can't control the way your hormones are making you feel.  While at the same time you have no idea how or why you are feeling a certain way.

What's even more sucky is when you can't predict when your hormones are going to make you an insane, tearful, crazy, calling other drivers cunts and flipping them off in traffic maniac.  If it was all just as simple as every 28 days PMS it wouldn't just jump up and surprise me.  I'd be like OH!  Yes that explains so much.  I don't have PMS like that because I don't have periods.  So when I wake up in the morning a crazy person it takes me a little bit to figure it out because the calendar doesn't tell me it's time for that hormonal bull shit.

Don't get me wrong.  I have no illusions about the fact that men have to deal with hormones too.  I think men have a hormonal cycle just like women and end up being little bitches with their own PMS bullshit to deal with.  It's just a different level.  As a woman, hormones make you crazy.  As a man hormones just make you a dick.  I would much rather be bitchy then cry any day.

The other thing about being hormonal like this, at least for me, is that although I hate everyone all I really want to do is lay in bed and cuddle and have sex.  Yes, I admitted that. After discussing this phenomena with many friends I'm not the only one.  What is about being a complete and total bitch that makes you horny as hell?  Your significant other certainly doesn't think your crazy hormonal self is sexy.  Why would anyone want to cuddle and make out with a puffy eyed woman that has been slamming shit around and scowling all day?  I don't even like myself when I feel this way, I certainly don't expect anyone else to like me.

I guess the benefit to being a property manager is that I'll probably get to yell at someone today and maybe even make them cry.  I am also in a position where I can just close my office door and ignore everyone if I want to.  Right now I'm going to go get a cup of coffee and go to the bathroom to cry (because if you cry in the bathroom it didn't happen). Wish me, my staff, my boyfriend and everyone on my commute home today luck.  I think we're all going to need it.  

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